A decade old truth

It was raining that evening. The on-going unassuming drizzle-ish rain that doesn’t ask for your attention and just let’s you be.
She always considered their friendship akin to this light rain.
Comfortable. Silent. Soothing.
They were sitting in the balcony.
Pack of smokes done with.
It was day 3 of the smoke- marathon.
It seemed something was on his mind. She didn’t ask. She never did.
She liked the silence.

“We have been friends for a real long time”
“Yup.”
“Did you know I fell in love with you?”
“Ofcourse you did.”
“I’m serious.”
“Ofcourse you are. I also love you. You have been there for me always.”
“You aren’t getting it. I really am in love with you.”
“You are married. you have two kids”
“Yes. And I do love my wife too. But I love you too”

Rain grew a bit heavy. Accompanied by lightening.

She heard him. If that means that the sound waves entered her brain via her ears.
She knew what it meant.
But she didn’t really get it. She thought married men were safe.

Taking her silence for… don’t really know what, her continued unloading himself of this secret that he has been carrying for all these years.
How he thinks about her.

He doesn’t love me. He just thinks he does. Silly man. He is protective about me. That’s it.
Thinking it is all figured out, she calmed down and let him vent.
Half the time she was not even listening.

Rain wasn’t heavy anymore but it was noticable now. Wind was blowing the rain in the balcony now.
She didn’t like it. She didn’t move.

“I used to delete our messages and call logs time to time. Didn’t want her to see them and think something else.”
“Why there was nothing wrong in them. I never felt anything for you so.. nothing.”
“Yes I know but still. I didn’t want her to worry”

Somewhere in the back of her head, a niggling thought started pushing through.
He stopped talking. There was silence.
She didn’t like it.

She asked him to leave. He did.
She felt icky. Like your feet would feel in a shoe drenched in dirty water from a puddle.
She thought back to all those years of friendship and long conversations sharing wine in a parking lot.
With the filter of realities unveiled tonight, it all looked very different.
she didn’t like it.
Like she didn’t like the rain also anymore.

 

Eyes

THANK YOU JINGLE for the Perfect Poet Award for Week 8 entry.
And a biiiiiiiiiig thanks and warm hug to all who nominated me. I am so very glad you liked my writing 🙂
For Week 9 nominations, I would like to nominate Meghana. Her poetry flows naturally and its fun to read. Do try it out, you would love it surely!

Here is my entry for Week 9.

EYES

He looked at her
with a hesistant smile on his face
Will she be happy to see me
or take a swap at me
thinking about latter made his blood race
She did not smack him
he was a bit relieved
but neither did she smile at him
His heart felt crushed by load of guilt
for his lady love looked hurt
Her eyes accused him of betrayal
and breaking her trust
I am sorry my love
please forgive me this time, his eyes implored
You are the only light of my life
I value you higher than the all mighty lord
She gave him a searching look
Wanting to believe him
for his sake and her own
She could see his love brimming in his eyes
and knew he would see the same
reflected in her own
His pain at seeing her disappointment
gave a her heart and soul an ecstatic surge
She saw him smile, tension leaving his face
and she realized his smile was in response to her own
They spoke to each other at length
their eyes confessing their love
and their fingers and signs professing their words.


Heaven Exists

Sound of birds chirping
Breeze rustling the leaves
Mild sunrays falling on me
You lying next to me

Sigh
Who says heaven doesn’t exist

Heaven exists

I got a Perfect poet award for my Week 7 entry. THANK YOU JINGLE & everyone who nominated me 🙂 🙂 🙂

Perfect Poet Award for Week 7 from JINGLE!!!

I would like to pass on an awsome award to following 12 fellow poets whom I really enjoy reading, infact, Im in total awe of their imagination and perfection of their writing 🙂

  1. William
  2. Beth
  3. Noah
  4. Meghana
  5. Poetry Perspectives
  6. Jaymie
  7. Ishabelle
  8. Brian
  9. Shakira
  10. Kseverny
  11. Gerardine Baugh
  12. Poet Traveler

You guys TOTALLY ROCK!!!

Love Today

Once upon a time
he would have waited for eternity
just to get a glimpse of her.
Rebel against the world
to be with her forever and ever.
Once upon a time
she would have braved
path of thorns and
hurtful words of one and all
It all is worth it, she would think
if I can be with my soulmate, my love.
But that was
Once upon a time.
Today…
He thinks he has to choose
between his career and marrying her.
She would be demanding and distracting,
my weakness she will be, not my strength.
Today…
Things she adores in her lover
do not make him an ideal husband material
He is laidback and he is a thinker
He lives in his dream world
it’s not at all real.
Another love story scumbs to the demand of practical realities.
Thank you Jingle for the Perfect Poet Award.
For this week, I would nominate Nanno

Burned

It was perfect evening of the most perfect day. No hassles about college lectures and project deadlines and researches and interims bla bla bla. All of it was pushed in the background today.

It was only him and her.

And their own personal V-Day.

“I don’t want to celebrate our Valentine’s Day with rest of the world. Lets have it today instead of tomorrow. That way we’ll always remember it.”

It was indeed a great idea. And now it was time to head back to the hostel but not before their special event ritual….a Pastry treat at her fav bakery shop!

“Are you sure we have time for this? Its already 5 minutes to 7. We need to be back by 7:30.” She worriedly enquired while longingly looking at the bakery.

“We’ll gobble it down and then we’ll sprint our way back. Cmon, that way you’ll burn off the extra cals too” He teased her while pulling her towards the shop.

It was crowded as usual what with it being fav spot for tourists and locals alike. They managed to get a table and she talked about how she is going to be neck deep in guilt tomorrow morning while gorging on a piece of sinfully delicious midnight mud cake. He was trying to focus on what she was saying but the twinkle in her eyes and her happy smile kept distracting.

He sighed.

It couldn’t have been a better day…This is heaven.

****

I am in hell. Surely nothing else could feel so hot and burning. And its dark in here.

He tried to peep more in the darkness to finally realize that his eyes were closed. He tried opening them but it seemed as if they were glued together. Every single hair on him was painful and burning.

He could hear chaos around him. People coming and going. There was an air of tragedy and fear and death and demise around him. It scared him more.

Where am I? And how did I reach here?

He tried remembering it but even thinking seemed to hurt. All he could recall was her laughing face and then…..nothing. It seemed as if his mind was shutting down.

He lost consciousness thinking about this.

It was 2 days later he opened his eyes.

He was in a hospital. His parents were next to him and so was his best buddy. They all looked worn out as if they hadn’t slept a wink in days. He looked around but didn’t see anyone else. Where is she?

His mother was crying. It seemed as if she had been at it for quite some time.

He tried speakin but all came out was a weak croak.

“No dont try to talk. We are waiting for doctor to come. Let him check you.” His friend suggested.

Doctor examined him with an expressionless face and took his parents outside to talk to them.

“W-wh-aat ha-hap-p-ped?” These 2 words only drained him out.

His friend looked at the door willing for his parents to come back. He did not want to be one to answer this question.

As it turned out, he didn’t need to.

He saw a news paper lying nearby folded to the front page news.

Blast rips Pune’s German Bakery; 9 dead, 45 wounded

It all came back to him like his worst nightmare.

The blast. The fire. The screams. The blood.

“They are saying it was a terror attack.  Doctors say you have around 75% burns. You both were right there in the bakery that time…a part of the roof fell on your legs trapping you in. ” He registered his friend’s words but they seemed to be coming from far off.

“My legs. They are hurting real bad.” His friend grimaced. And suddenly it dawned on him with sharp clarity.

“My legs…??”

“They had no choice. They had to save your life. That was the priority. Docs say you have 75% burns! Legs could have got infected. They HAD TO cut them. But you do have hope…you may live.”

“What happened to her?”

“She also lost a leg. But her condition is far worse. 90% burns. Her organs are all scorched. They are not at all sure about her.”

When pain crosses a threshold, you cannot feel it anymore. He did not feel his burns and pain. What he felt was deep inside him.

His perfect day of love was ruined by an act of violence.

Red of love was transformed to Red of blood.

He was scarred for life. And so were many others. Will their lives be same ever again?

Burned

This story is part fiction but unfortunately rooted in the terrible tragedy that took place on 13th Feb in Pune. The boy in question is a friend of someone I know. He lost his legs and is fighting for his life right now.

Please pray for him and all others who gt caught in this act of hatred and violence. What purpose could such merciless killing serve for anyone!?!

I remembered you

Standing in crowded grocery billing line waiting for it to crawl further, I look at my watch and remember how you used to tease me for being a stickler for time management. How you would come before me but still hide and make me wait for whole 5 minutes, just to see that where-the-devil-is-he look on my face.

Standing in the crowded billing line, I remembered you and I smiled.

On my morning jog, sweaty and sticky I am looking forward to a nice shower. I recalled how you loved to see me all sweaty and bothered.

Jogging all by myself, I remembered you and I blushed.

I hear a piercing whistle on phone while talking to someone. I particularly find it irritating to my ears and am not averse to even cursing the person responsible for it. You would whistle right in my ear every time we are talking on phone, just to hear me snap at you. And I would react angry coz I knew you loved it.

Talking on phone to someone else, I laughed.

People around me have seriously started doubting my sanity now.

All because I remember you 🙂

Remembering you

Hating you

You said I simply can never hate you
If only you knew how much I do hate you
How much I have always hated you.
 
Hate you for storming into my life,
uninvited
and smashing down all my defences
making me vulnerable to you.
You hurt me so many times
I did not retaliate
thinking YOU would be hurt.
Still you accuse ME of hurting you!
imagine if I wanted, what all I could have done.
 
Hate you for making me feel so much for you
I cannot leave you when your life is not all rosy
Cannot see you all alone, so sad and gloomy
And so I am right beside you just in case you need me
And I will stay even though it kills me
Till the time I can’t anymore
or till the time you don’t need me anymore
 
But till then I will hate you
for making me love you so much
that I put you before me.
Does that make me a doormat?
 
 
 
 

Ok this is not exactly a poem but it’s something I just wanted to take out.