Comfort Zone

Wikipedia defines comfort zone as “…a type of mental conditioning that causes a person to create and operate mental boundaries. Such boundaries create an unfounded sense of security.” Human beings by nature seek a comfort zone. And its true for all aspects of our life-relationships, work, our physical work n many others. About a year back I was forced to confront the fact that my life is practically ruled by laws laid down by my comfort zone in every aspect of my life. And I decided to change it- one thing at a time. I resigned from my cozy comfy job. Being in media, there is actually nothing called cozy comfy but after working on same brand for 3 years, I had a good understanding of the work with little surprises. Things ran almost on an auto pilot.

So I moved out of there and joined another company…its been 6 months and I’m still trying to find my groove here. Its scary- from a sure position to a completely unknown environment. What makes it worse is that when I was moving out, I did not think it will be this tough- I somehow assumed that there will be a ready void that I would conveniently fill in…stupid eh. But I forgot that voids are always hidden. There are days I don’t feel like going to office, there are days when I almost regret the decision and think of all the people who are comfortably working 6 years+ in same company- they don’t feel this itch…what was I thinking to leave a steady thing and move?? It all comes back to my comfort zone. It doesn’t end with you moving out of it, its inertia also tries to lure you back. You are plagued with doubts and regrets- and there is no solution to these. So far I am not giving in. Its not going the way I originally envisioned but it will work out in the end.

Comfort Zone

Any kind of happy…

‘It’s better to be any kind of happy than to be miserable about someone you can’t have”
Leah Clearwater Breaking Dawn

The only thing worth remembering from the 2 hour torture of Breaking dawn (but Breaking Dawn is not the point right now).. not coz I whole heartedly agree with it or strongly disagree. but coz I cannot make my mind… somewhere it shook me.

How do you decide something is un-achievable? when is it that you should give up… and when you give up, do you have to move away from it necessarily? So the only thing that should hold you on is whether you can get it or not. Honestly it sounds a bit selfish to me… reminds me of a child like tantrum.. i want it, if i cant have it then i don’t want to be near it at all!

But then this can be argued from another point as well…

Is there any logic in running after something which is clearly not yours… never meant to be yours, never will be yours? Keeping up the hope and seeing it get dashed every single time… how long can a human stand it. how long before you break from this self-inflicted torture?

Is it really amateur to see a lost cause in face and do what is right by your self as well as for those around us? Who decides what is right what is the more prudent thing to do?

The bigger question in all this is not what is the right thing to do…

It is..

 

 

Do you have it in you to do the right thing? Sometimes, that’s all that decides everything.

 


A Veiled Life

All our lives we wear a veil
Not to hide our body
but to hide our soul
Some do it to avoid getting hurt
For baring your soul makes you vulnerable to pain
Some coz they are ashamed of their truest selves
No one wants to be rejected again
We say what we are supposed to
React as expected from us
All the while
silently looking for that someone
who can make us feel safe enough
to take off the veil and just be ourselves
and be accepted for what we are.
No matter what you achieve
no matter what you gain
At the end of the day,
isn’t that all that one yearns.

Veiled Existence

Secret

Secret.
Secret gives rise to curiosity.
Is it bad? Yes, considering its said to have killed a cat.
But wasnt it the lure of the secret of the apple
that led to apparent downfall of Eve and actually gave birth to human race.
Where would you and I be, if anywhere if it wasnt for curious Eve sinking her teeth in the forbidden fruit.
Mona Lisa smiles and the world wonders why
Is there a secret to her alluring smile? Does she know something that I dont.
We want to know it all. And especially what we are told we shouldn’t know.
Such is a lure of a secret.
Pursuing it can give you acute insomnia
Unrevealing it gives a high like hitting a jackpot.
It gives a feeling of achievement and
ofcourse a boost to ever-present self ego.
But some secrets are best hidden
for revealing them can bring disasters, uproot the life as we know
maybe for one, maybe for all
But then….isn’t that the biggest lure of all?

I am a Liar.

For once as a rarest of rare occurance,
I am being honest with you and telling you that i am a liar.
A habitual one? A pathological one? Or occassional?
I guess thats not relevant but nevertheless I am a liar.
I laughed my heart out watching Devdas
and cartoons make me cry
I am a liar.
I abhor chillies, it gives me funny feeling in my stomach
But its not that i like sweets any better
I am a liar.
Doin favors for people makes me feel contented.
Its said to mean I like to throw my weight around
So should I feel bad about it?
I am thinking but i cant decide; or maybe I dont want to.
I am a liar.
My friends meet me and say I hardly act like a gal
I wonder what will they say if they saw me changing my lipcolor thrice this mornin.
I am a liar.
I like buying handbags; you can never have enough of them
Still its a pain carrying them and i prefer a wallet anyday
I am a liar
Some of it is a lie, most of it is true
Some of it is true, most of it is a lie
Whosoever reads it will try to put a ‘T’ or ‘F’ across each line.
Just keep one thing in mind when you do so
I am a liar.

Topic courtesy Bakfire.

Broken Thread

Following is a post I wrote long time back. Reproducing it here.

Who breaks the thread; One who pulls it or one who holds on?

I read this quote somewhere and just cudnt let it go…finding an answer to this became a question of integral importance for me.
Who breaks the thread…
Some wud say that the one who pulls it coz he broke the equilibrium.
Pretty simple huh!?!
Maybe not…
At times its important to pull the thread…in such a situation the one holding it needs to let it go…on his understanding of the situation lies the onus of salvaging the thread.

But then again one can argue, shudnt one hold on to what one holds dear? Should one just let go at a small tug? What happened to standing by and fighting for whats yours and what you believe in? Is all that phoney?


No it isnt…but then you have to recognize a lost cause. While not giving in may at times salvage the situation but then if the other person keeps on repeatedly tugging the other end then you know you have to let go of it before it snaps into two. Recognizing such a situation tests the true metal of a person’s logical and practical judgement and will power.

Wow! How convinient is that!?! So the entire onus of salvaging the thread falls on the poor soul who is not even initiating the tug in the first place. Why shudnt the one who pulls the thread bear the brunt of the mishap? Is it to be assumed that his judgement and decision of tugging the thread was accurate on all accounts? Couldnt his logical and practical judgement be flawed? And if it is, then isnt it the responsibility of the other person to bring out the true picture?

And the argument continues….

This is like those unanswerable circular mysteries of human thinking which dont have a concrete answer. And how could there be one when what we are talking about is human thoughts and behaviour.

While I was swinging between these 2 stances, there came a 3rd angle which made this entire excercise futile….What do you do with the thread if its not broken? If one pulls it and other does let go of it, the thread is intact but is it of any use? Whats the big idea about salvaging it when it is not connecting anything? When the 2 ends of the thread have drifted apart, is it any different from another piece of junk?

Commitment or happiness!?!

The way I look @ it, whatever you do in life, your ultimate aim is your happiness. If something makes you happy, don’t think twice about taking it up. Afterall, if you cant make yourself happy, you cannot make anyone happy. 🙂 So your happiness is paramount.

On another side is commitment. Something which you have taken up. Mind it, this is different from responsibility since responsibility is at times given to you or you are even born with it. But commitment is something you take up or you make out of your own free will. So its your word against everything else. It goes without saying that you have to see it through.

So what to do when/if there is a clash of des 2 objectives!?!

What if your commitment comes in way of your happiness? Maybe dis clash was not apparent at the time of making the commitment and reveals in dues course. So should one give up on the commitment coz it turned out to be different from what he/she bargained for? And just give up on this cause of discomfort and be happy again?

But then can one be happy/content when they have falsified der own word? IS it wise giving up something coz it was different from our expectations? Shouldn’t we stick to it since it was a choice we made for ourself and if not one else, we should honour it for our own sake?

Any comments anyone?