The Five Year Plan

Planning is such a waste of time especially for people who know they can never stick to a plan. Its only good coz once you have made a plan for things, now you know exactly how the things WILL NOT work out. Frankly, does anything ever work out as per your plans?

So I never plan anything. End of the matter.

But then that’s not something you can tell the world right. Especially when one is going for an interview.And there you get to face the emperor of the most stupid interview questions ever.

Where do you see yourself 5 years from now??

I mean cmon man…how are you supposed to answer that one right…who knows what can happen in 5 years (no one saw this eco crisis coming, did they?). But you are supposed to answer it accurately. And the most ironic part is even the interviewer knows no one answers this question truthfully. So this is only to test if you can lie through your teeth.

I can think of a number of different answers to this super lame question but obviously they cannot be said in an interview…but here they are. Feel free to add some of your own.

Q: Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?

A1: 5 year older obviously!

A2: As far away as possible from all the companies asking this question.

A3: Does it take 5 years to reach your seat?

A4: Much farther than you had seen yourself 5 years back.

A5: Definitely NOT sitting on your seat asking the same silly question.

A6: does it really matter to you?

A7: No but I can tell you where I see myself 5 seconds from now…walking out of this room if such questions continue

A8: If I could make a 5 year plan, I would be in the budget committee of Govt of India.

A9: Ah well dats a very interesting question. Maybe completing my research on exactly which part of the brain triggers such stupid questions.

A10: Married to the company’s heir.

A11: Answering same silly question to some other interviewer.

And the list goes on….

I definetely aint gonna subject any of the people I ever happen to interview to such an ordeal.

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5 thoughts on “The Five Year Plan

  1. nope, i ain’t – and yeah – what i usually ask whn i take da interviews is ‘ wht is the growth plan you envisage in two years’ or something like that – and the aim is just to know that if the candidate have any road map or not… but yes, this question alone is hardly conclusive, but yes – i have heard some very detailed plans from some candidates…

  2. Personally i think its a quicksand question…and the ones with detailed plans are surely fake. Especially if you have just started out a career, its not possible for you to chalk out how is it gonna go for you.

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